I suffered from a minute ache in
my wrist which eventually led me to Leukemia. It was a rare symptom and so maybe
then on whenever I get to hear that a person is suffering from something as
small as a mere headache brings the horror that it can lead to something really
big. It is just me and people hate me for this. I cannot help it. It’s not like
I intentionally choose to think of bad stuff but it’s just I have been through
it.
Every time I see her hands
shivering, I am worried. She is not old enough to have her hands trembling when
she holds a vessel or serves us on the dining table. It is not something really
common. The worst part is the doctors don’t get to know the cause of it. Just
prescribing some random pills to minimize it isn’t a solution. (Who would know
this better than me?) But again, how am I supposed to help? All I can do is see
her suffer.
I wonder if being a Ganesha fan gives her all her strength :-) |
Every time when she has a
headache, I am tensed. Headaches are quite frequent. Now I do not even get to
know when she has it because almost every time she has it. Just like
pancreatitis has become a part of my life, headaches have become hers. All day,
all night she would have the pain in her head but she wouldn’t speak of it, not
anymore. A few months back when her head kept spinning every morning when she
woke up, I was terrified. Why would she have it?
Never has she asked me to make
dinner when she is sick, not that I know how to cook but still she never asked
me to help her. She never asked me to help her wash the clothes even if it’s
the washing machine which does the whole work. She would never sit in front of
the TV because she would feel that she could do something productive instead.
She wouldn’t gossip with the neighbors because she feels it has done no good to
anyone ever.
She took care of her two children
when she was suffering from a lot of emotional and mental stress in her life. I
have seen her cry and it is the worst feeling ever. The moment she realized
that the problems of her life affected her kids and she pushed them away only
to concentrate on her children, on us, my brother and me. Believe me, this is
what a mother is capable of doing leaving the woman in her behind.
She is the strongest person; I
have seen in my entire life and probably would ever see. Seeing her own
daughter in death bed and not shedding a single tear in front of her is really
a BIG thing. I do not know how I am going to repay her, not that she would ask
me to.
This lady, my own mother, has
been my role model and would always be no matter which path I would choose. She
let me know what it is to be a woman and more importantly a mother not only to
the kids she gave birth to but also the kid she married. (Yes, because I think
as a wife I wouldn’t have tolerated my Papa’s tantrums but Mamma handles him
well enough and I am sure he would agree too.)
Once a thought crossed my mind, “You
know you’re growing up when you realize that the relationship of care, love and
responsibilities between a mother and daughter is also a two-way relationship. "
She likes all my facebook updates
because she knows I would love to have more numbers of likes, she visits every
single shop in the malls for hours when she knows I have no intention of buying
anything, she keeps on asking me to learn cooking so that I can help myself in
emergency situations, she hates it when I ignore my studies because I am
reading Nicholas Sparks but she never snatches my book away, she listens to me over phone when I have an
emotional breakdown, she is patient with me when I just want to blabber, she
laughs at my innocently bold nature when I speak something which girls usually
do not speak in front of their parents and it goes on and on.
Because my facebook and twitter
timeline is full of mother’s day wishes, because I have my exam tomorrow but I
haven’t started studying, because she is now angry that I am not studying,
because I thought it’s a nice way to butter her, because not every day I
appreciate her, because I love her all the time but fail to convey, because I
realized that we are friends when I was sixteen, because it’s MOTHER’S DAY and
even if these words do not convey much and I can go on and on and on, because
now I have said because so many times, I stop.
HAPPY MOTHER’S DAY MAMMA! YOU’RE
PRECIOUS!! :D You’re a SWEETHEART <3
Comments
A nice post on a nice occasion. Keep the fire burning.
Thank you again :-)
Much love and strength to you all.
Post a Comment