The Lonesome

As I sit here thinking about my life

I look into the distance and realize

change isn't just hovering over me

Winter too is overtaking autumn, I can see.

The soothing breeze is now chilly

And the thoughts in my mind hazy

Life seems all messed up through my smudgy eyes

which also wonder about the changing sky.

Winter they say marks the end

-conclusion of the year, life as well.

If only the confused soul of mine could get

-the solace of being clarified-

things could turn out in a different way.

Like the wintry weather are the insides of me

People would call it the effect of being lonely

Assuming  is something they always like

It's my choice to be alone, they recite

Having loved winter since the days of fantasy

for the cozy warm moments of cuddling as a kid

now in the cusp of adulthood

I see winter as lonesome as me.

Lost are the moments of giggling and laughing

Now emotions are as dry as fallen leaves.

Longing is what I find in this crispy evening

-longing to be understood and accepted by somebody...anybody.

They quote,  "If winter is here, can spring be far behind?"

I ask if darkness can be enjoyed then why wait for the light?

Being depressed is not a reverie

though it has its magic...

...magic of letting you know how

strong you're to tolerate this frostiness

...to get to spring...to happiness.